From A Spark To A Song – Sketching Dreams

For me, the reminiscence of emotional souvenirs always unexpectedly awakes in tidal flashes of colors and fuzzy sparks of late night memories. “Sketching Dreams” is the result of such flashes and sparks… Arisen ghosts of a past that’s never far away enough to be called a forgotten evanescence, shades of fragile moments I wish forgiven, I wish to be free from, specters of sentiments I wish would remain hidden in the deepest of all blurred whispers… just as I wish for the phantoms of my profound anguishes to vanish in the halo of the neon lights I feed with illusive white lies, hoping that by dressing my darkest despairs with a joyful cloak of sacred remembrance, I would find myself some sleep again. But sometimes dreams ain’t what we wish for… as they might remain the pale incarnation of what we may deny our soul to be unshackled from… as they may turn the brightest of all dreams into an out of focus type of glazed revision of reality… but as you let go, you can instinctively start sketching and daubing elements of what used to be invisible and out of sight. And then, the dream is yours again to paint with high hope and jubilant love…

I wrote “Sketching Dreams” on a voyage to the ocean, on a journey of my own, part illusionary hankering, part wishful thinking. Some pilgrimages are yearning desires for redeeming light, for any natural essence that can stimulate sight and make things visible, for any vibration that can emulate the sensation of a heartfelt desire for innocence and rebirth. I realized that when you’re nobody’s firstborn son, the howling passing over the marked frame door of your house ain’t as comforting as you think it would be, as you slowly awake amidst the first murmurs of the morning. And you convince yourself that an orphan’s salvation doesn’t taste as sweet as the cup of sorrows you have begged to be saved from, leaving you in a stoical acceptance of the profound desolation that kept blooming out of your own depiction of faithless doubts and belonging deprivation. You somehow become a frigid and indifferent stranger wandering in the garden of your own misery, recollecting what it felt like to be fragile and vulnerable, musing about the idea of liberty, fantasizing about freedom. Waves are high when hope is shallow. The journey ain’t always made of what we eagerly long to experience…

When I look back at the journey from which “Sketching Dreams” blossomed, I cannot help but revisit the ambiguous feelings with which I was seeding my heart and the deceiving emotions my soul harvested at the time. I cannot help but recollect the pieces of souvenirs that set me on such an unexpected journey of finding myself and redefining my vision of what tomorrow might be made of, despite the nature of the troubled past I had yet to make peace with and the essence of a felted present that had yet to be fulfilling. The waves are high when faith’s nearsighted. Abandoned love is a lifetime grief when you cannot find enough peace to sleep. Just as truth sets free, there’s a true freedom in witnessing your only way out, disappearing before your very eyes, in finding your illusions being just out of reach. It’s when you think you’ve lost everything that you realize you had nothing… had nothing worth craving for, worth mourning for… and that very state of sincerity and honesty is a magnificent moment by which we can surrender without capitulating. As true as the skin is soft when love is unsettled, a heart is healed when the soul is unraveled…

And from the stoical nature of the fatalist undertone I thought was defining “Sketching Dreams”, I realized today even more how misery can lure any contemplative sacred whisper into becoming an illusional type of self-abandoned worship. As depraving as it might be, when you don’t have the strength or the courage to ask yourself who you truly are or what you cynically became, it could be the most unexpected opportunity to reinvent yourself and redefine everything you desperately hold on to. “Vague Souvenir” is the embodiment of such reinvention and redefinition. “Sketching Dreams” might have been the origin of a journey that has yet to be completed, but from the high hope immersion of which we are daily regenerated, from the jubilant love stream of which we are constantly purified. Staring at the sky, the offshore is unknown…

– Alex

Comments (3)

  • Lou


    J`ai acheté votre album cette été et je l`adore!!
    Votre musique m`accompagne dans mon quotidien!! Ma chanson favorite est sketching dreams parmis tant d`autres!! Bravo à tous les membre du groupe!!


  • Marjo


    Thanks Alex for sharing with such honesty because I could relate to what you say… since I’m a human being, meaning that I’m weak at times too…

    Actually, I learned that it’s ok to have dreams in life… through a vision!! But I also learned that the line between dreams and illusions is so thin at times… when you loose sight of the vision somehow along the way… Hopefully, even though you get lost at some point…it’s possible to get back on track…

    The thing, I guess, is to get your heart, will and vision all aligned straight… so that you never get lost in a whirlwind of never ending illusions that seem so close to what you want to live… but which are actually taking you away from the path you’re meant to be on!! And when I think about it… every time I walked according to the purest and most honest desires of my heart, those turned into reality, without me even noticing it… maybe not like I would have imagined… but it’s making me live the life I always dreamed of!! And this all makes me realize that being in awe and contemplating what has been done… instead of standing still… while dwelling into countless illusions… is really what makes me happy, fulfilled and grow in life!!


  • Chris


    There are two sentences that I copy pasted in my personal documents from your blog. The first one is: ”It could be the most unexpected opportunity to reinvent yourself and redefine everything you desperately hold on to” and the second one is this one:
    ”From the high hope immersion of which we are daily regenerated, from the jubilant love stream of which we are constantly purified”.

    Surrender is a living cup we must drink every day I guess… Letting go of everything so that our ”Sketching Dreams” can be redefined… Maybe we are dreaming about things we are not even desiring in our hearts… Through letting go, we can realize that all of that time, the beauty was somewhere else… It lives inside of us already…

    I believe this blog is full of encouragement, It shows me that memories are not only ”light feeding the pain” as we read in the song lyrics, they can be redefined and give birth to whole new dreams!!


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